Funny how adding one makes such a difference! Yesterday I posted about our first threesome. I told you want happened, but now I need to share our thoughts and reactions.
We knew this day would come. From before our relationship started, we had talked about this happening. Back then it was more a him+guy and me+girl with the other partner present to observe as the way of sharing more than an actual threesome where we’re both involved. We’re both bisexual, we both want to have fun with our own gender.
But in the past six months, we’ve started talking about more than just that. We’ve talked about him sharing me with other men. There are some real life men out there he would really like to share me with. In our mutual masturbation fantasies, there’s talk of making me a cum slut where I just get fucked and fucked by one guy after the next. Its a very hot fantasy we both enjoy.
As much as I want my time with a woman, I’m not sure I can share him with another woman. My boyfriend understands my point of view. Every time we discuss this, he tells me its not important to him and whatever my comfort level and decision is, he will be happy with it. I love that freedom to safely say how I really feel and have that automatically accepted and appreciated.
Our first threesome experience wasn’t what either of us would have guessed it would be. Pegging? Of all the sexual acts I would never have guessed that to be my first experience with another man. Pegging requires a lot of communication and trust between partners. I don’t adovcate just shoving anything into an oriface; but working a dildo into the ass of someone you met five minutes ago makes the stakes really high in terms of comfort and trust.
During our initial conversation, Mr. A mentioned that women typically want to sit and talk before jumping in to sex whereas men are much more of a “Hi” then drop your pants and jump into sex. The more I thought about this, the more it struck me why it was so important to me.
I don’t like casual sex.
I’ve never had casual sex before. For me, sex is too intimate to just happen randomly. Both of my partners (prior to the threesome) were the result of a loving relationship. I never let anything physical happen without those feelings in place.
With Mr. A, even though I barely touched him, even holding his legs while pegging him was… uninteresting. I think the reason why he wasn’t interested in finishing with me pegging him was because I was noticeably disinterested. It meant nothing to me and I didn’t want to be involved very much.
I loved watching my boyfriend interact with Mr. A. That was very hot and it made me so happy to see him so pleased. He really enjoyed it sucking cock and having his own sucked. However, he could tell how I wasn’t as into it as we thought I would or could be. I think my disinterest lowered his enjoyment a bit.
My boyfriend has had one night stands in the past. He’s not where I am in terms of needing that connection to enjoy it. However, I think our relationship is so close and so happy that this experience was just sex and having that direct comparison made it just pale in comparison.
In the end, there’s no replacement for intimacy in a sexual relationship.
Will we still play with others? Absolutely. That hasn’t changed. But next time, I think we both want those extra partner(s) to be people we know, like, and can connect with person to person.